You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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