Your dad touched me again.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
