so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Randomize
