In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
