He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
