I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
