Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
