This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
