I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
This is classic penis vs brain.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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