Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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