At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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