Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize