I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
