I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
