brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
