why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
