i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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