I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize