So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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