was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
