all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
