shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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