I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
