O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
