Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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