I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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