You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
