Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize