its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Randomize
