You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Randomize
