i don't like sucking hair
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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