i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize