Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
