she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
