so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize