Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
