What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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