he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
