My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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