the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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