My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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