I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Randomize
