he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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