so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
