you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
