Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
