can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
