i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
