she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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