That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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